a beard

a women who goes on a date with a gay man to mask the fact that he is gay.
boss asks you and your girl friend to join him and his wife for dinner, you accept. ( boss suffers from severe h-m-phobia ). you need a beard.
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a woman that a h-m-s-xual male dates or marries as a cover for his true s-xuallity.
everyone knew don was gay. his wife, sally, was just a beard.
a woman who is dating a gay man and who unbeknownst to her is covering for his latent h-m-s-xuality.
“greg doesn’t really like susan, she’s just a beard.”
a beard is a unit of time, 30 minutes to be exact. this is the amount of time it takes mrs rhodes from newlaithes school to grow a beard.
“i’ll be over in about a beard”
the amount of time it would take to get from one place to another, defined in terms of the amount of facial hair that could be grown before you get there.

from legendary gower surfer, ‘bryn-dogg.’
‘it’s about a beard in that direction’, or ‘go that way for a beard’, or ‘it takes about a beard’.