Advice Monkey


a (usually quite arrogant, hypocritical and narcissistic) person who feels compelled to give other people tons of personal advice and perhaps even detailed instructions on how to live their lives. this person is always never in any sort of position to actually give advice, being almost defined by their poor choices and often barely functional or even dysfunctional in their own lives.
my friend michael the advice monkey won’t shut the f-ck up with his advice on health and street smarts; he’s also on several antidepressants and lives in a section 8 apartment with his cat.

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  • mhmsiit

    mates help mates stick it in turgs. highly esteemed wing-men. they tried c-ck-blocking but realised it wasn’t for them. now they help out anyone who needs some female attention 😉 “i’m having trouble with the ladies” he complained. “oi give the mhmsiit a call” his good friend replied.

  • shift some units

    slingin some hardcore drugs. any bloke you see wearing his speedies outside centerlink with a b-mbag hanging over his puffed out chest is sure to be hey bro want to go chase some gangas tomorrow arvo? cant bruz, rent is due, gotta go shift some units

  • skiing in the backseat

    when sitting in the backseat of a car between two dudes and jerks them off simultaneously as if you were pushing yourself on a pair of skiis yesterday brandon and darries invited marisol to go skiing in the backseat of brandon’s car.

  • snizzhole

    three-way 😉 i can’t believe you snizzholed them!


Disclaimer: Advice Monkey definition / meaning should not be considered complete, up to date, and is not intended to be used in place of a visit, consultation, or advice of a legal, medical, or any other professional. All content on this website is for informational purposes only.