ammosexual

a term for someone who feels affection for firearms. often an attraction to the beauty and design of the gun, but can also refer to love for the history, freedom, security, or tactile feel of the gun. also typified by those who feel joy in being able to find and acquire ammunition to feed their firearms, especially at an affordable price.

ammos-xuals, like many alternative lifestyle groups, have been ruthlessly attacked by hate-filled bigots who desire the eradication of individual liberty and equality, in favor of either violent mobs, might-makes-right, or tyrant kings.

fearing violence and protests, most ammos-xuals are forced to hide their biological affection from vocal and violent prejudice. ammos-xuals are frequently the target of anti-freedom laws and politicians, and are currently denied many freedoms granted to other minority groups in most nations.
hey, want to see my new favorite rifle? her name’s vera.

are you an ammos-xual, too? do you want to maybe try being range buddies?
a s-xual fetish that finds pleasure in the power to kill dozens of people with the pull of a trigger. an ammos-xual may understand the desire of other people to live, but feels all the greater pleasure in contemplating that he has the power to overcome that desire with his power. ammos-xuals are very protective of their fetish, and attack even the slightest gun safety measure on the grounds that they interfere with their pleasure.
many ammos-xuals practice the religion of gundamentalism or demand the invasion of weaker countries as a means of reaching wargasm.
after every m-ss killing, ammos-xuals gather for an orgy of suppressing gun control measures.
a male who refuses to wear anything resembling pastels. he believes turtles are for soup, not for necks. starbucks? the only buck this man cares about is a 12-pointer. no hair gels, no blow dryers, no skin care products, no breath mints, no socks with little pictures on them. sushi? that’s bait. manscaping? only if that refers to sewing up your own wound.
dave’s belief that any vehicle without a ball hitch isn’t street legal is clear evidence the man is an ammos-xual.
“an “open-carry firearm enthusiast” who is so p-ssionate, they take their weapons on dates, into restaurants and fast-food places. as described by bill maher’s new rules segment, ‘real time with bill maher, 6/6/2014; hbo
1) “i was going to get a milkshake, until i saw two ammos-xuals eating burgers.”
2) “good news everybody: r.j.’s steakhouse quit allowing ammos-xuals!”