An Old Lady


an elderly l-ss, who by an odd occurrence swallowed a fly. reasoning that it would be prudent to dispose of the fly as soon as possible, this old lady promptly swallowed a spider. however, she soon found that the arachnid would wriggle and tickle inside of her. attempting to rid herself of it, the lady swallowed a bird. presumably a smaller variety, as birds can grow to be quite large. regardless, the fruitless adventure continued. the lady then swallowed a cat. the feral beast undoubtedly caused a great deal of discomfort on the way down, prompting the lady to take a drastic course of action. desperate to rid herself of the newfound perplexity, she swallowed an entire cow. how in the world she managed to do this is beyond anyone’s comprehension. it would appear very clear that the entirety of this problem could have been avoided if the madam had simply kept her mouth shut. regardless, the unfortunate saga continued. the lady, obviously very near death, deemed it necessary to get rid of the cow. she swallowed a horse. the internal rupture of her organs became too great at this point, and the lady p-ssed away in great agony.
person 1: hey, did you hear about what happened?
person 2: no, what happened?
person 1: an old lady died, dude.
person 2: oh sh-t! how?
person 1: she swallowed a fly
person 2: n00b

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