Asian swamp eel


a common practice between friends in j-pan resulting in one friend slipping an eel into another friend’s r-ct-m. it is most commonly done as an old traditional drinking game in which the first person to p-ss out is the lucky recipient. daniel tosh loves this prank, especially because it results in m-ssive internal hemorrhaging and dehydration thus resulting in death due to hypovolemic shock.
one day, daniel tosh, a very strong supporter of globalization, agreed to party with a group of j-panese chefs. tosh, being the lightweight that he is, got very drunk, took his pants off, and p-ssed out at the party. the j-panese men spread his cheeks and inserted their prized swamp eel into his r-ct-m. luckily for tosh, he was so used to taking things in the -ss that the swamp eel had little effect. to this day the asian swamp eel lives in the lower bowels of his intestine, eating the pride (that he swallows daily).

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