Branden

anyone born with the name branden is clearly considered the alpha male of all males. women drool over the presence of a branden, and will try desperately to get into a branden’s pants. they are shaped perfectly, tone, have beautiful hair, amazing eyes, perfect skin. a branden is always pleasurable in bed and know’s s-x by perfection. any branden is instantly adapted to liquor and can handle m-ss amounts in a short amount of time without getting sick, they are an alcohol champ. a branden is extremely experienced in the arts of combat and be very dangerous when irritated, keep caution when a branden gets angry unless you’re an attractive female… then be happy. branden’s are usually very romantic but balance it out with a very strong s-xual side, the scent of a branden will make a female love. branden’s always have very big urethra’s, and are able to pleasure women with ease. everyone will eventually have a love for a branden. a branden will eventually rule the planet earth.
“hey girls..”
“yeah?”
“you see that man over there?”
“mhmm..”
“he must be a branden, s-xy and hung like a horse.”
“lets get em’ girls!”
a guy who is f-cking awesome. who says whaaaaaaa like a pimp. is pefect in every way,hair and all. respective to the ladies. doesnt like younger women. drinks beer like a champ/ mans man. likes to get into iegall activity. aggressive only wen intoxicated. makes you smile.
i want a guy like branden ?
brandens, (usually males), are very funny, and smart! they may seem quiet in public, but are really outgoing when they’re with their friends. brandens are normally very tall, with long legs. they’re normally very cute and attractive! brandens normally have curly hair, and are very skinny. they enjoy being awesome all day, everyday. brandens are always there for their friends, and always will be. they make great boyfriends, and treat any girl well. they’re very kind, funny, talented, and sweet. if you know a branden, keep him in your life!
“branden, you’re so awesome!”
“d-mn, branden is cool!”
“ooooh, what’s his name? he’s cuteee!”
“that would be branden.”
cool, amazing, generous, s-xy guy. loves to dance to britney spears or beyonce! the one with all the new music! a walking celebrity encyclopedia! a guy with a great b-tt! the one everyone looks forward to seeing! the one everyone wants advice from. the cool guy that everyone likes to be around. the one with four best friends. the short but s-xy one. the one i call mine!
branden is a s-xy “watch yo mouth”!
verb.
the act of rubbing against a pole.
male. maybe.
loves giving away sweaters.
branden is fun.

oh burn.