Collateral Shittage


collateral sh-ttage occurs when there is an explosion of liquid sh-t and feces of biblical proportion. generally, collateral sh-ttage is not antic-p-ted. rather, one expects a clean pinch and drop of an otherwise healthy t-rd. when collateral sh-ttage occurs, it results in a wet, thick, sh-t overspray that sticks around the oring and blasts out and upwards onto the -ss cheeks and even as far as the lower back. it splatters the toilet bowel and may even run along and down the toilet seat rim appearing like warm -ss batter. in extreme cases, it may even reach the floor or surrounding walls. collateral sh-ttage is difficult to clean up and results in a typical endless wipe.
carl was heading out of the office for an afternoon sales meeting. on the way out, he felt a sudden clinching of his oring. he ran to the rest room to where he thought he would have pinched the perfect loaf. however, his mexican lunch came back to haunt him and his -ss exploded in virtual liquid fire and brimstone and he blew out his colon with collateral sh-ttage all over the stool, his -ss and onto the tail of his dress shirt. needless to say, carl cancelled his meeting and went home to shower his mung -ss.

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