Cryopractor


(noun) kr-eye-oh-praahk-tore :

a backromancer with magical ice spells and philososcienceligions that freeze spinal disconcordatio ns and mishap-happenings rather than traditional suplexes, mortal k-mbuht fatalitees, or mechanically induced midget p-rnalities…

a surgeon who stays one step ahead of the back pains and brains with migraines by using icy rains and frosty janes…

and if they can’t fix yah…you get placed in stasis for 25,000 billion years until new technowizards can blurbble their trifling yargabble and make boo-boo go bye-bye.
“my old-new-now cryopracticioner ate a baby demon’s head the other week…i told them my thoracic hurt like hebrews did in mordor, but he told me an irish tale of mythical toilet stomps aaaaaand froze my pee-pee.
the cryopractor works on mysterious ways i guess, yes sir.”

“yes, quite a hexaposterial point of view”

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