Cumbria
c-mbria is a extreme north, shire country, in the extreme north of extremeness. as many extremes as there may be in that sentence it doesn’t change how there is near nothing extreme about c-mbria, but at least they have more than a pete doherty, from cr-ppy northumberland. they have william wordsworth, jesus, and merlin.
c-mbria is what the people daaan saaaath like to call, part of scotland. they are very wrong though, c-mbria is in fact part of england. the c-mbrians proved it. taking many back breaking years, but it is proven, c-mbria is part of england, northumberland on the other hand..
c-mbria, despite being one country, it is actually two countries combined into one. the first country is east c-mberland, with the shared capital placement of carlisle, and kendal, and don’t be fooled by kendal, all they do is make mint cake, /it’s not cake/.
then the second country is west c-mberland, that capital is normally whitehaven. everyone there is part of the “sellafield posse” to be honest they just have brain damage from all that nuclear radiation going about. which leaves us to feel sorry for sad little seascale.
c-mbrians have been known to speak a different language we like to call c-mbrian, or just .. drunk babble. whenever you visit this land of beauty and sheep, be sure to just nod and smile as they speak to you. also, buy things from the tourist booths. so sit down, tell us how ya’ fettle is, and give us the crack on where you‘re frey.
border crack and deekabout, it’s la’al c-mbria.
a really sh-t county in the north west of the uk, filled with sheep, hills and a lot of chav’s.
sheep + hills + isolation = c-mbria
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