Definition of Sex


this is what you tell your daughter when she says she’s never had s-x yet.

“well princess, if a man -j-c-l-t-s in your presence with your permission, consent, or active partic-p-tion, you just had s-x.”

if your son says something similar the slight variation is “did you -j-c-l-t- in the presence of…etc

insertion exemption: any consensual insertion of p-n-s or p-n-s like object into a bodily oriface can qualify as s-x too.
man: “honey i’m home from work and stopped at a peep show but don’t worry i didn’t have s-x. i didn’t m-st-rb-t- to completion because i was too drunk from my 5 martini lunch.

wife: “you what!!!!!!?”

man: “its ok, urban dictionary says the urban dictionary says that this doesn’t qualify as the definition of s-x”

alternate example:

daughter: “i’m still a virgin cause i have my cherry. i only let my boyfriend -ss hump me

father: “you are one sick pup, princess”

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