Disability Envy

disability envy is when chav’s (mainly chavettes) are jealous that someone they vaguely know gets free footwear, free nappies, free and full-time nursery places, a free mobility car, free road tax, re-housing, free adaptionations, free transport to school and all the other ‘perks’ that come with having a child with a disability.

the jealousy usually manifests itself as heckles like ‘paint your f—–g fence’ or ‘i told you aleeeeeeeeeeeshaaaa (or similar name for the under fives who has become immune to being sworn at and who are most often allowed to play out until 10pm) not to f—–g play in their b—–d garden’. sometimes it manifest itself from better known aquaintences who like to make snide and unjustified comments about the dis/abilities of your child, what a better job they could do in your position and how much easier their lives would have been with the ‘free stuff’ for their own (non-disabled) children. people have been known to say ‘they’re not that disabled’ and ‘yea but you’re set for life now!’

disability envy should not be confused with p-n-s envy. although, in both instances the offenders have flacid c-cks growing out of their foreheads.
mother: i wish my child could go to university, have a husband, have a baby, stay dry throughout the day and night, write or recognise her own name.
chav with disability envy: yes, but you get free nappies!?

mother: i’m so worried what will happen when i die or if i become ill and not able to care for my child.
posh friend with disability envy: oh i wish i could have gotten rupert into nursery without those astronomical fees. what did you say? i was distracted by your new shiny free car.