drop a thrice

the act of dropping a thrice is the most complete, enlightening form of sh-t known to man. it has been called ‘sh-tting your guts out’, ‘sh-tting out a lung’ or other such terms, but the thrice holds a place in all our hearts. the thrice, like its close cousin, the deuce, requires more than one flush to evacuate. it is however most effective in public facilities. a thrice is usually a leg numbing experience and it can shock many first timers. the thrice is not a sh-t to be taken lightly. users should be well versed in its usage before it is taken public. thrices wait for no man. they have a tendency to interrupt fancy diners with a member of the opposite s-x, said person’s family, meetings with a superior, gaming sessions. a thrice can and will creep up on you at any give time. it should be made clear that a thrice needs to be at the top of one’s priorities when it comes to such events. a thrice should be evacuated by no less than three flushes, however exceptions can be made. if you, yourself, require a courtesy flusha thrice has been achieved. in public, if you hear people come in and leave immediately, a thrice has been achieved. a thrice should be flushed at least once however. if not it is apt to leave behind floaters of epic, radioactive proportions. an oncoming thrice can be detected by sudden cramping of the bowls, an almost incurable urge to ninja dust, loud, possibly wet, flatulence and even prairie d-gg-ng. once the thrice has been moved, the facility of your choice has been befouled, all that is left to clean up. a thrice-wipe should usually consist of at least two wipes per flush, making sure not to plug the toilet, as bad things happen if your throne ceases to function mid-thrice. one the final wipe make sure to ‘wipe till ya bleed’ or the akward post-thrice-squishiness will befall you.
“dude, i just deuced it hardcore in your bathroom!”

“hahahaha your funny, cuz i just dropped a thrice in your bathroom”

“aww, f-ck dude you didnt?”

“no i didnt. i wanted to drop a thrice, but i couldnt find the handle so its all festering in there.”

-pukes-“aww f-ckin sh-t dude’