drop bear

a native to the australian outback, the drop bear is a mysterious, yet chillingly savage member of the marsupial family. if you are unlucky enough to pitch a tent under a tree inhabited by a drop bear, and rouse it from it’s slumber, be prepared for pain country! it will drop from the tree, latching onto your face (a la the facehugger from the alien)and proceeds to rid you of any good looks you may (or may not) have once had.

only known deterrant is a generous smearing of vegemite behind the ears. it saved me once and i’d do it again in a heartbeat!
“quick bazza, grab the ‘303 mate! wazza and macca got drop bears on ’em and are runnin round like headless chooks!!”
relatives of the koala, indigenous to australia…these are the scariest most insane creaters in the world. largely unknown to those outside australia!
the bl–dy drop bears mate…betta whatcheself-
an australian animal. extremely dangerous and barely known.
“don’t camp under that tree. there could be drop bears”
australian tree-dwelling marsupial, found mostly in bushland areas, but also known to live in inner-city parks.
the drop bear is characterised by it’s unusual defense mechanism – when the male senses danger, the drop bear glides or ‘drops’ down from it’s perch and uses it’s powerful hind spur to barb the enemy’s eyes.
a drop bear landed on our tent while we were camping.
a marsupial related to the koala but much more aggressive in nature. drops from trees onto unsuspecting prey and rips them apart with their large teeth and claws. several people who go camping in the australian outback fall victim to this creature each year.

see also hoop snake
did you hear that? it sounded like a drop bea…aaaauuggghhaaaaauuth!!!! -rip rip tear tear-
an australian arboreal, (tree dwelling) marsupial that is related to a koala but is highly evolved. they are carnivores. they catch their prey by dropping from the trees and ripping their victim’s heads off. sometimes the sheer weight of the drop bear will knock it’s prey out, and the bear will simply feast off the victim’s head.

a common remedy remedy to repel dropbears is to smear vegemite over your face. the distinct smell drives the bear away. the australian government has tried to hide the existence of the drop bear for the sake of australia’s tourism. although drop bears are quite rare they inhabit small towns and there has been a number of drop bear related deaths.

in appearance, they are similar to koala’s but have large canine teeth. there are different sub-species, but primary they look like normal koalas. when on ground they are capable of running at 60kmp/h. there are no captive dropbears, as they are too difficult to catch. beware of the dropbear.
“johnny got taken by a dropbear the other day…”
“oh no! that’s so sad! did they find his body?”
“nothing but a corpse torn apart. you could barley tell it was him…”
the most fearsome marsupial of australia. they hide in trees and will prevent anyone from camping beneath the foliage, for they will drop down upon you and maim and/or eat you. see also hoop snakes
i was going to travel to australia but those drop bears sound dangerous.

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