drug test


when parents, schools, and other idiots test you for various drugs. often a surprise test. one of the most failed tests ever.
parent: you’ve been doing drugs havn’t you? i’m making you take a drug test!
a test that will most likely f-ck you over.
lets hope your not a pot head (pssh yeah right)
kid:where are we going?
parent:your going to get drug tested.
kid’s mind:fuuuccccckkkkkkkkkk!
the bane of humanity.
i have to go take a drug test because the man is bringing me down.
something the court system makes you do for stealing something from a store…some how they find a conccetion and we’ve all missed it
wtf…how do you get drug test from stealing….
1) taking mind altering substances right before a wordy exam that requires you to express an opinion – such as philosophy or english literature, enhancing your ability to plumb the depths of the mind and/or lowering your inhibitions enough to say what you really think, whilst either enhancing or diminishing your ability to actually write it down.

2) letting your mate be the first to sample the latest batch of drugs you have acquired, by pretending that you have all already taken some and the effects are really good, whereas in fact you suspect you have just been sold half a kilo of caustic soda.

3) a test performed by people in authority who are too scared to take drugs, in order to see if any of their employees are actually any fun outside of work.
1) i can’t believe i got an a in religious studies, i scored some bud an hour before the exam and had a sly toke to keep me calm but it just made me so much more able to refute things eloquently.

2) dave! long time no see, fancy a line? this is great stuff man i’ve been on it for weeks.

3) “all employees will have a drug test on monday”
“um, i’m the regional manager, have never had a bad review, got promoted twice last year and brought in 6 new accounts this month already. and i take drugs. my team are the most useless bunch of monkeys who ever came down from the trees and none of them take drugs. what exactly is the point of this test?”
“all employees will have a drug test on monday”

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