Episcopal High School


also known as “the high school”. founded in 1839 in alexandria, virginia, this boarding school affectionately nicknamed “the high school” is the place to send your kids if you are southern, preppy, athletic, and intelligent. it was the first high school founded in the state of virginia. the school’s biggest academic and athletic rival is woodberry forest school in orange, va but for the past 15 years or so, episcopal has been raising its standards of excellence thanks to the admission of females. episcopal graduates usually attend colleges such as uva, unc, uga, vanderbilt, davidson, w&l, princeton, harvard, brown, yale, sewanee, wake forest, and tulane. ehs has a tradition of excellence both in and outside of the cl-ssroom and tends to attract good-looking, athletic, and bright students. students at episcopal spend their free time playing lacrosse, roaming around in lilly, rainbows, and croakies, listening to 94.7 (the arrow), hanging out around dal, or eating maggie moos at “the center”.
episcopal girl: “did you see that freshman wearing my new lilly print today in chapel?”

episcopal boy: “the game against woodberry is this sat-rday so y’all better pack the bowl!”
episcopal high school is a school where you go if you are either intellegent, athletic, charismatic, musical, artistic, or any that good stuff. it is also known as ehs.

has great facilities, like a state of the art science center, a amazing art center which is full of beutiful paintings and pictures, a library with incredible ammounts of books and movies to rent. it also has amazing faculty.

of course, occasionaly loses to woodberry forest school in football, but the record is pretty close, around 50/50.
when it comes to most other sports, like wrestling, basketball, and especially soccer, with the ehs soccer team becoming state champions, ehs destroys woodberry.

ehs is also right next to the major city of washington dc, instead of being in the middle of nowhere (well, besides next to a farm with sheep- cough woodberry cough- ) which let’s the students able to go to see concerts, museums, plays, shops, and many other things.

ehs also have amazing fine arts and academic departments, with plays and artwork, and projectors all over the school.

as a final point, ehs has girls. guess who doesn’t.
episcopal high school: full of awesome people.
houston, texas. the high school where all of the rich druggies, the rich stupid people (usually the same people as the rich druggies in the case of ehs as it turns out), and the ridiculously good (possibly juicing) people at sports go
i am a rich stupid druggie and go to episcopal high school
i am good at sports, so i go to ehs
high school in alexandria, va where girls get up at 6 am everyday to straighten their hair, then put on clothing that makes them look like tye-died watermelons or oversized easter eggs. all the guys look exactly the same as well, and after school and on weekends get out their pink polos and skater shoes and go longboarding. episcopal kids can’t play sports, as much as they’d like to think they can.
a few days in the life of episcopal:
crisis. a big couple just broke up. all freshman girls can be seen crying to each other’s rooms even though none of them actually knew either person in the couple.
crisis. i lost my small black northface. it must be somewhere on campus.
crisis. i didn’t get the room i wanted next year, my life is therefore over.
crisis. even though i don’t actually play lacrosse i lost my lax stick. lax is life.
crisis. the oc didn’t come on this week.
the worst school in the houston area. 99% of the people there are major potheads. they think they are the hsit, but they are really not. they are high- rich preppy -ss kids who suck at lacrosse. yea ehs sucks
episcopal high school rich b-tches suck a lot.
the school that has a nasty habit of losing to woodberry forest on a regular basis, especially in football, in which woodberry has won far more of the 104 games that have been played between the schools.
ehs guy 1: d-mnit! we lost to woodberry again! hannah, where are you going?
hannah (ehs girl and ehs guy 1’s girlfriend): i’m going over to talk to that woodberry guy. stop whining so much, you’re not good at sports, accept that.
a school located in alexandria, virginia. the majority of the boys at this school were not accepted into woodberry forest school, which is considered of much higher quality than episcopal high school. the girls there are okay, you almost feel bad for them because they have to go to school with a bunch of f-gs that are just bitter because they didnt get into woodberry. ehs is renowned for getting there -sses kicked by woodberry, namely in football, and namely when they lost 42-0 to woodberry in november of 2005. yeah, it was 36-0 at halftime, and then when woodberry got bored, the smallest kid on their team decided to f-ck up some kid from ehs until he had to go off the field on a stretcher. ehs as a school is usually lumped in the category of other girls with f-ggot male students, such as st. christopher’s and collegiate. they all want to go to woodberry, but are too stupid. ehs is full of potheads and f-ckups. they are referred to as goons by many people, as they suck so much they cant have an actual school mascot. the end.
“you go to episcopal high school?”
“yes.”
“oh, i guess that means you didnt get into woodberry.”
or
“you go to episcopal high school?”
“yes.”
“wow, you f-ckin suck.”

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