Extended Essay

a sick lengthy essay developed by someone who thought that making high school children write a 4000 word college level essay would be funny. the inventor of such an essay is compared to those such as joseph stalin, for the reason for creation was for the “justice and equality for all those students suffering through the international baccalaureate”.

the extended essay was said to have been the cause of the large drop out rate in the international baccalaureate program, as students described the process of writing this essay on any topic possible as h-ll, death, insaity, suicidal, painful and suffering.

however, the extended essay is also looked upon to expand the learning of the students in seek of a challenge. the students that view the extended essay as a challege are a very small minority of the students enrolled in ib. to the large consensous of the ib population, the extended essay has no bearing on ones future, but demonstrates a large amount of stress compared to a sentencing on death row.
tommy: man i can’t believe i signed up for international baccalaureate, they put us through h-ll with this extended essay requirement
patric: i know, i haven’t slept in 13 days because of this -ssignment. the only thing keeping me going is the 5 redbulls i drnk every time i wink
tommy: you got to do whatever you can to get into those ivey league schools
patric: hopefully the extended essay will allow me to achieve my three bonus points, and allowing me to score a 45 in my ib mark. that way i can go to yale and find an interesting women, and hopefully marry rich!
tommy: that’s why we’re in it brother…
a paper that an ib student has 2 years to write, -ssigned by a useless cl-ss called tok or theory of knowledge. it has a 4000 word limit and can be written on anything the student likes. after a year of stressing about cas hours, the tok essay, ib orals, and endless work, the student relizes the paper is due the next day and must bullsh– his way through a 4000 word paper that is not in the subject (such as psychology, biology etc)they chose. the paper is usually submitted to turnitin.com and is 99% copied because of the numerous incidences of plagerism found in the paper. this paper must be accepted by ib or you will not recieve the diploma and you wasted 2 years of your life and gave up your soul and have become a living zombie and will eventually become a crackwh-r-.
1.shana- hey lynn, why did you cut school today

lynn- because the extended essay was due today

jesse- steph, wats up with igor, i heard plucked out his own eye b-lls

steph- his extended essay was rejected by ib
4,000 words of pure h-ll
i wrote my extended essay in literature. i did not sleep for 3 days straight.
4000 words of pure pain, insomnia, coffee and supreme procrastination. ee for enemies. works effectively as catalyst to extinguish its victims’ sleep time. will cause its victims to curse their own existence, doubt their eventual intelligence (most of the times just leftovers of it, due to world lit, tok and other kinds of cerebral m-ssacre) and devote to coffee-ism. finding a way of distorting a very simple idea into a million-word sentence, in a desperate attempt to cover as many words as possible.
time 1: hey, what’s up?
time 2: i have to go, there is a guy trying to work on his extended essay. gotta go faaaast!