fasterbate


the act of masterbating very quickly as to get it over with to avoid detection
i had to fasterbate because my mom was in the next room
the act of taking a laptop to the bathroom with you in order to relieve yourself after relieving yourself.
“david, why are you taking the laptop to the bathroom?”
“i’m just going to fasterbate, mom!”
to flap ones nostrils wildly or in a circular motion.
hey kenda! where were you yesterday?

sorry i fasterbated so hard yesterday i p-ssed out.
fas-ter-bate (n)
to refrain from m-st-rb-t–n (in any form) over an indefinate period of time, usually for the purpose of building antic-p-tion of ones next masterbatorial or s-xual experience, and to increase ones personal pleasure thereof
i was tired of not feeling anything when my girlfriend blew me, so i fasterbated for a month. when i came she almost drownded. sh-t was so cash.

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