feng shui



a divination tool based on a mélange of astronomy and astrology, geology and geomancy, and intuition and reason, used by superst*tious folks to “prevent disharmony between positive and negative energies.”
it’s an irony that other than older folks in the east and new age charlatans in the west, who take feng shui seriously, youngsters in most parts of asia view it as mere superst*tion.
fahng-shwei
fuhng-shwei
fehng-shwee (my pr*nunciation)

the chinese-originated belief that the environment gives energy that you can use to your own being. not just a belief; it actually is real.

there is actually a whole lot to feng shui, but you should look it up on your own. lemme give you some examples:
take for example, a mansion. let’s say you have a mansion and it is very-well decorated. your feng shui would be great because you feel at great leisure because of the cleanliness & well-designed room of your own.
an example of negative feng shui would be if you live in a house that is not apt to your tastes, and is possibly filled with trash, or perhaps even an enormous pig-sty. this negative feng shui will possibly foster laziness, and even psychological results such as negative emotions, doubt, etc.

feng shui deals not only with your personal shelter, but also the environment in general.

most unfortunately, feng shui has been perverted into a drug-related symbol thanks to the hippies, along with the yin-yang (which basically represents good & evil in us all). in otherwords, when you speak of feng shui to the general public, you’re probably going to be prejudged as a nut-job. sad really.
hippies need to realize completely what yin-yang and feng shui mean. they are not drug symbols. they are philosophical symbols that originated from ancient china, and these symbols have deep backgrounds that is worth researching.
“my house is a pig-sty so my feng shui is horrible. but sometimes, you make do. if you want better feng shui if you’re in a pig-sty house, go outside and go for a walk. just make sure you don’t get too addicted to the freedom out there, or else you’ll never want to go back to your pig-sty home. that’s how i am.”
-me
chinese for obsessive compulsive disorder (ocd).
ed: dude i see your mom rearranged your living room again.

zander: yeah man, her feng shui is totally acting up again.
used as a verb, “feng shui” means making a bad situation into a good situation by acting right. it could also refer to being cool, discreet, collected, and nonchalant. it can be similar to “lope.”
“so, was the party you went to awkward? you didn’t know anyone there.”
“nah, i feng shuied it.”

“cops are here. feng shui it.”
the ancient chinese art of rearranging things to channel energy and give aesthetic pleasure, namely your money into the pocket of a pract*tioner
“ahh this house have bad energy, feng shui not good, money in wrong place, should be in my wallet”

“ahh much better!”
the deliberate malicious rearranging of furniture to create a tripping hazzard for unsuspecting victims.
i went into the living room to put back the phone without flipping the light switch and became a victim of feng shui when i faceplanted onto the recently relocated aerobics trampoline.
used as a verb to describe the movement of an object or idea from one place to another, ostensibly to improve it, or its surroundings in some way.
i wasn’t able to sleep until i feng shuied the couch onto its end.

hey, feng shui me another beer, will ‘ya?

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