when the earth has suffered through so many cringey memes and autistic blows that god himself can no longer change the fate of his planet and decides to flee from the scene before it’s too late
person 1: bro check this out, sony has created virtual reality fidget spinners
person 2: we both know that only exists because god left
a cute hot girl who is very trustworthy. she is not sl-tty. very funny girl. likes cereal alot. hates fk boys. guy1: hey dude see that new girl, layalle? guy2: d-mn right i did. lord that girl is hot. guy1: oh but god is she mine! guy2: f-ck no! guy1: h-ll ya!
- trevor hedge
total douchebag don’t be such a trevor hedge
- eddy davidson
pr-nounced: a-nul pra-ree-dawg a small, hard, tenacious ball of fecal matter that resists expulsion from the -n-s and causes great discomfort. dammit, i have this persistent pelvic pressure and i keep squatting , but i just cannot squeeze out this eddy davidson. out, eddy davidson, out already!
slambadextrius , the art of one being able to hit themselves with both hands . hey paul , check this out, i can hit myself with both hands , wow joe , that’s ducking amazing , you must be slambadextrius, lol
- turkish camelback ride
the mother of all wedgies. give someone a wedgie, lay them flat on their stomach, bend their leg back & hook their toes into the waistband of pulled-up underwear. not only is this an ultrawedgie, but the only way out is for the ‘victim’ to pull their underwear even further up their b-tt to get […]