Goosaroo


a cavernous v-g-n-, usually -ssociated with old women who have been smoking for many years. their voices have become raspy and they enjoy vodka and botox.

a goosaroo can come in two different variations:

the goosaroo of an elderly latino woman is often very hot and humid. the environment inside is very similar to that of a tropical rain forest.

on the contrary, the goosaroo of an elderly woman of any other ethnicity is the different. the environment can be most similarly related to that of an arctic tundra. it is often extremely frigid and many icicles can be found within.

though no matter the race of the elderly lady, the physics of the goosaroo are the same. the closest thing (that is popular in the general public) to a goosaroo, would be a black-hole. goosaroos are capable of consuming anything that gets too close to it. just like a black-hole, anything that gets pulled in is lost forever, never to return from it’s depths. however, there is one exception to this rule. an actor by the name of greg kinnear (whom residence is within a goosaroo), has the unique ability to escape from within it. though, he will only do this on the occasion of him intending the murder of an innocent and topless individual.

one way that the goosaroo varies from a black-hole (other than the fact that it resides as the gentiles of long-lived women), is that scientist have discovered through a series of trials and tribulation, just what a living organism must endure upon it’s entry into a goosaroo. an organism is instantly granted eternal life. unfortunately, the life from there on out is never comfortable ((see section about environment)). this leaves many of the specimens that are trapped within the confounds of a goosaroo, desperately wishing for death. unfortunately for them, that death will never be granted…
jack: “did you see those naked pictures of julie andrews?”
kevin: “yeah. she totally has a goosaroo!”

lindsay: “oh no! where did my dog go?”
olivia: “hmm… it must have gotten too close to that woman’s goosaroo.. you’ll never see your dog again.”

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