Granbury


a place where senior citizens, baptists, and crystal meth users all come to die. it is a gilmore girls meets twilight zone episode infused with the stench of marlboro lights and bling cross jewlery.

a historical stroll through the lovely downtown will remind you that racism and bigotry are still strong in america when you see a confederate flag b-mper sticker crookedly stuck to the back of a 90’s style ford mustang (next to a ‘i have a terrific kid in gisd’ sign that raves of the offspring the world must endure)

granbury places are mostly country side, and a great place to raise a family. meth lab explosions color the night sky and will make for fond memories for years to come.

places that are granbury have gated communities that keep wealthy drunk sl-tty housewives feeling superior. to make the poor feel special, they get gated communities too! it keeps the pitbulls, mexicans, and poor white trash safe from those from those pesky coloreds.

not only is a granbury rich with culture, it also has the corner on entertainment! why, the center of the town boasts not only a walmart, but a super walmart!

after a night on the town singing off-key karaoke and drinking natty light (on tap!) at the metropolitan bars trying to find a mate with teeth, get your grease on with your local policemen at the whataburger!

only the lucky get to call granbury home.
i want to move so badly, this place is granbury.

are you from granbury?
-no! well, yeah, but i’m not very granbury, so it’s ok.

why do they call it the hood?

-it is granbury.

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