grandxerxes
andy smith; self-proclaimed grandxerxes was xerxes’ 2nd cousin from a lesser known catholic family the smiths. he frequently partook in colosseum battles but his pegleg and fear owls kept him from really succeeding. he became more of a show since he could simply raise his overgrown lobster arm (scientists determined it was a slow moving form of bone cancer that he was able to build up protective tumors from) and smash his opponents down. he could draw immense crowds to the battles. his futile attempt to poison his 2nd cousin and over throw his reign was thwarted by xerxes trusty mail owls that were casually returning to the roost. tragically, andy panicked and his m-ssive lobster arm crushed his own skull.
have you heard the tragic tale of grandxerxes and his lobster arm? how horrific.
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