guinea palace


an extravagant home, typically constructed for an italian-american family in new york or new jersey. they will typically be clad in some sort of masonry and often times feature circular or pull around driveways.

driveways will often be constructed from some sort of paving stone and is not uncommon to see some fancy patterns laid with the pavers. stone towers marking the entrance to the driveway is a necessity, typically topped with a lion or gargoyle.

another key feature to any guinea palace is a large iron gate at the driveway with the first letter of the family name in the center.

the interior of the home will almost always feature an obnoxiously bright and swagged out chandelier in the double height foyer which can clearly be seen by half of the neighborhood through the large window above the front door. some sort of jogged or curved stairway will guide you to the second floor of the palace which is strictly off limits to visitors (except for coomads).

large cases of fine china which never get used and 3-4 dining tables may also be found. it is also very common for there to be an in-law apartment in the bas-m-nt. overall, a warm and welcoming place where everyone who enters becomes a part of the family.
wow, did you see the (insert generic italian last name) new guinea palace? that place must have cost a small fortune. the garbage business must be booming.

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