Harrington Park

the smallest, most boring town in the world. home of nature man and dj immense. friday and sat-rday nights consist of walking around aimlessly with your friends trying to think of something to do, or spending three hours sitting in vera’s with a slice of pizza and a c-ke. everyone’s loaded but choose to “live modestly” so you can’t tell. we waste our money on buying a $10,000 electrical sign to put outside borough hall, just so we can return it and get less than half the money back. hp is a town where everyone knows everything about each other, and you’re considered a bad-ss if you break a bottle outside of jerry’s and don’t pick it up. the police have nothing better to do than bust people for jaywalking or investigate who wrote the graffiti on the shed outside the school. it’s the gayest place ever but you’ve gotta love it. the end.
-yo man, what are you doing tonight?
-you know, the usual. just chillen around the streets of harrington park, stopping by the cleaners to jack some lollipops. maybe hitting the deli for some mad drinks.
-dude, i’m so there.
harrington park is a small, upper-middle cl-ss town in new jersey with smart people. the people are usually nice and innocent. most people are able to afford a bigger house but decide not to waste a lot of money so they buy modest homes. activities comprise of going to the town pool (only in the summer), going to “downtown” (jerry’s, prestos, etc.), the random nail salon, and wandering beechwoods if you feel adventurous. walking aimlessly around town during the weekend is common. the school is very good and prepares kids (for the most part) for high school. it is also one of the safest towns in bergen county. the taxes here are unbelievably high because of lack of businesses in this town. it’s a boring town, yet at the same time it’s a great town.
bob: hey did you here about that girl from harrington park?
george: oh yeah, she’s going to yale!
bob: smart harrington park people…
a town that has no place to go except jerrys, vera’s, the park, and the convenience store. people who live there chose to live a modest life, that only applies for upper-middle cl-ssmen. the houses are mad expensive and the kids usually get whatever they want. the students are actually hardcore(except for some) and can usually beat someone up (verbally or phsyically). everybody knows each other and the police are really strict. the education is harsh, too. most hp kids who go to highschool usually get into top colleges.
harrington park is r-t-rded, but it’s cute.
person 1: yo, i see some harrington park kids!
person2: run!
the coolest town in all of new jersey. all the girls are so super gorgeous and everyone loves them. everyone always has fun. even thought its lots of fun all the kids are really smart! this is the best nicest coolest awesome. they have an awesome volleyball, basketball, and soccer team. they all go to good colleges. they have jerrys, prestos and more stuff. hp is the best town on earth.
“hey you pretty girls, what town you from?”
“harrington park of course”

“well maybe thats what your so gorgeous”
a middle cl-ss naborhood, nothing bad about it and sometimes theres nothing to do but sleep, lots of pools and stuff like that.
harrington park is a town full of money not to spend but to “invest”
total bull
harrington park is the most, insignificant town in bergen county. mainly inhabited by rich white trash, the town is overflowing with cash but bothers not to invest it in anything instead of a sh-tty electrical sign outside the burough hall that’s gone. the main areas in town is jerry’s, vera’s, and the convenience store. almost nothing to do except go downtown, eat like a fat-ss, and go home shortly after. at random times, the entire town will reek of p-ss. you will be considered a bad-ss if you wander around at night and break bottles and not pick them up. of course, being a “bad-ss” in harrington park just means that you’re not considered a gay f-g in other towns. you will get in trouble with the police for potentially rebellious activities like jaywalking or cutting bushes that aren’t yours! you don’t have to worry much though, the special forces of harrington park are a bunch of bored cops armed with nerf guns. hate it or love it (mainly hate it), just stay away.
“wanna go bad-ss things like walk around at night and break bottles?”
“no way, that stuff is just scary! plus we’ll be out past our curfews and then our mommies will only let us spend $100 dollars at the mall!”
-in other towns-
“wow, harrington park is a f-ggy town.”