Hindi Hoof

the camel toe of an indo-aryan female. occurs when the fabric of tight clothing clings too closely to the mons pubis, revealing the outlines of her genitalia & thus appearing similar to the cloven pedal extremity of ungulate mammals. visible in paintings of the mughal or later timurid renaissance, when orats (ladies) would wear collant-tight shalwars with transparent kameezes to emphasise their ‘moose knuckles’ & induce erections in men.

based on the larger size of the ‘rhino hoof’ as compared to the ‘camel toe’, this term alludes to the magnified dimensions of the genitalia among indo-aryan & irano-aryan women, which (like north indian steatopygia) is partly caused by consumption of abundant sweets (eg. gulab jamun in punjab & rosgollas in bengal). however, it is the thick l-b– & fleshy external v-lv- alone which are larger, & not the actual v-g-n-. in fact, the slit of the indo-aryan v-g-n- itself is by default exceedingly tight, on account of the notoriously small size of the indo-aryan p-n-s as found among us hindustani males. thus the cleft ‘hindi hoof’, while being very large in terms of size, has its two toes sp-ced very close together as us ‘bhaiyya boys’ can never hope to cleave them apart with our ‘ganges worms’.

however, wide sp-cings are found among those of our hindi-aryan females who have had the good fortune of mating with ‘telingas’ (dravidians), & who have thus been stretched out by the much larger dravidian p-n-s.
1) rani roopmati of the mughal court in delhi wore a transparent kameez over her skin-tight churidaar shalwar. as she proudly walked through the opulent darbar (congregation), her hindi hoof was clearly visible. thus, the nawabs, sultans & mirzas had powerful erections when they saw her.

2) chota miyan: i love mehnaz’s big hindi hoof! let me see if she will grant me her favours tonight!
burra miyan: be careful – look how far apart her hoof toes are! only a telingana black snake could have stretched them that far apart! she won’t even be able to feel our delhi doodools now!
chota miyan: yes, you are right! she’s too much of an orat (woman) for us hindustani (north indian) boys now!

3) naughty sheikh chilli took his blow-pipe & shot a cherry into the cleft of mumtaz begum’s hindi hoof. as the punjabi lady was too conscious of her hairstyle, she didn’t feel it & so everybody in the delhi durbar wondered why she had stuck a cherry into her moose knuckle.

4) ajit: my little bacha (son) was running around & then b-mped into soma’s hindi hoof. when he turned around, he had a horse shoe shaped depression on his forehead!

5) ghasiti begum stood, nangoo (naked) above her shohar (husband), who had offended her by not chatoing (licking) her koon (-n-s) hard enough. so she dropped herself onto his chest as punishment. when she stood up, her hindi hoof had left a cloven impression on nawazish shah’s belly.