Holy Names Academy

1. a catholic all-girls school in seattle, washington. one of the most prestigious and academically rounded schools in the northwest. the stereo type is that we’re all a whole bunch of nerdy lezbos that are afraid of dudes.
2. the truth is, we’re all a bunch of s-xually deprived boy-crazy b-tches who will do anything with anyone. although there are some of us who resent both of these stereotypes don’t fit in to either categories and are actually normal.
1. look at that dude reading hamlet in the corner. oh wait, that’s a chick. she must be from holy names academy.

2. dude, i totally banged samantha last night. i was kinda off my game at first, but then i realized it didn’t matter because she was from holy names, and she’d do anything with me no matter how off i was.
home of the craziest b-tches west of the mississippi. a small catholic highschool, home to 600 of the finest and brightest young ladies in seattle. however due to insane amounts of homework and crazy nuns the girls tend to lose their minds and their labedos.

and no they dont wear skeezy uniforms
“what school do you go to”
“holy names academy, seattles number one choice for girls”
“oh cool do you have like, you know….uniforms”
“umm no”
“ok well then i dont think we should be friends”
a catholic all-girls school on capitol hill in seattle, washington, holy names carries more than its fair share of stereotypes, most of them being true.

1. everyone is a dyk-.
this is not true. there are very few lesbians at holy names, probably even less than your average high school. at holy names parties, however, same-s-x hookups run rampant, making attending a solely holy names party any o’dea guy’s wet dream.

2. every girl hardly resembles a female.

this is both true and false. there is nary a girl at holy names who looks feminine during the school day. on the weekends, about half the girls clean up extremely well, blowing off steam at a seattle prep or bishop blanchet party on copious amounts of cocaine, whilst the other half continue to wallow in their anime-plastered greasy-headed ugliness.

3. holy names girls are easy sl-ts.
this is true. from the bombsh-ll of the cl-ss to the drama nerd, the s-x lives of holy names students are enviable. should the s-x life not be up to standard, many hours of the day will be spent complaining and plotting as to how to remedy the situation. any guy can get lucky with a holy names girl. in addition, the sl-ttiness of the student body is only aided by the love of alcohol (preferably cheap) by many, and the fascination and experimentation with drugs by a select few.

holy names academy is also known as homely dames, holy dyk-s, and ho names
-i’m finna hit that roosevelt party. i heard the holy dyk-s are trynna go also and i need to get some easy -ss.

-i need a quick 30 bucks.
-sell a sh-t dime to a holy names girl, she’ll pay up.

-i’ve always wanted to be friends with someone who enjoys cosplay, never washes their hair, and likes to have kinky s-x after doing the homework due three or four weeks from now.
-try holy names academy.”