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a gay parody of sir mix-a-lot’s baby got back that i made up. i’m straight, believe it or not.

h-m- got c-ck

i like big c-cks and i can not lie
you other brothers can’t deny
that when a guy walks in with an itty-bitty -sshole
and a long thing in your face
you get sprung
wanna pull up front
cuz you notice that d-ck was stuffed
deep in the jeans he’s wearing
i’m hooked and i can’t stop staring
oh, baby i wanna get with ya
and take your picture
my homeboys tried to warn me
but with that trouser snake you got
makes me so h-rny
ooh, rub his smooth skin
you say you wanna get in my benz
well use me use me cuz you aint that average t-rd burglar friendz

i’ve seen them gay dancin’
to h-ll with romancin’
sweat, wet, got it goin like a turbo vette

i’m tired of queer magazines
saying average logs are the thing
take the average flaming man and ask him that
he’s gotta pack much junk

so fellas (yeah) fellas (yeah)
has your boytoy got the meat (h-ll yeah)
tell him to shake it, (shake it), shake it, (shake it), shake that healthy bolt and nuts

h-m- got c-ck

(la face with a san fran bulge)

i like’em long and thick
and when i’m throwin a gig
i just can’t help myself
i’m actin like an animal
now here’s my gay scandal

i wanna get you home
and uh, double up uh uh
i aint talkin bout playgirl
cuz p-n-s pumps are made for little boys
i wann’em real thick and juicy
so find that juicy double
felch-a-lot’s in trouble
beggin for a piece of that bubblehead
so i’m lookin’ at gay p-rn videos
knockin’ these himbos walkin’ like trannies
you can have them himbos
i’ll keep my men like jeff stryker
a word to the thick d-ck brothas
i wanna get with ya
i won’t cus or hit ya
but i gotta be ‘straight’ when i say i wanna uhhhh
till the break of dawn
h-m- got it goin on
a lot of itty-bitty men won’t like this song
cuz them punks like to hit it and quit it
and i’d rather stay and play
cuz i’m long and i’m strong
and i’m down to get the friction on

so queerbaits (yeah), queerbaits (yeah)
if you wanna f-ck my -ss (yeah)
then turn around
whip it out
even white boys got to shout

h-m- got c-ck
h-m- got c-ck

yeah queermo
when it comes to males
the advocate ain’t got nothin to do with my selection
13 inches long, 8 inches around
uh-uh
only when he’s flaccid

so your boyfriend rolls a hummer
playin’ bareback tapes by chad hunt and matt summers
but summers ain’t got a motor inna’ front of his hummer
my buns don’t want none unless you’ve got an anaconda, hon
you can do vacuum pump or pills, but please go get p-n-s enlargement surgery
some brothers wanna play that hard role
and tell you that the d-ck ain’t gold
so they toss it and leave it
and i pull up quick to retrieve it
so, in touch says you’re little
well, i ain’t down with that
cuz your -sshole is small and your bat is swinging low
and i’m thinkin bout stickin
to the short beanpole queens in the magazines
you aint it miss thing
give me a well endowed fairy, i can’t resist him
genetics and testosterone didn’t miss him
some knucklehead tried to dis
cuz his boytoys are on my list
he had game, but he chose to hit ’em
and i pull up quick to get wit ’em
so queermos, if the d-ck is long and weighs some hefty pounds
and you wanna triple x throw down
dial 1-900-gayf-ck and kick them nasty thoughts

h-m- got c-ck
h-m- got c-ck
i love that song h-m- got c-ck, it makes me want to f-ck a m-ssive c-ck.