Jose-Luising
the act of performing piano where the performance is preceded, presented, and usually ended with m-ssive amounts of douchef-ggery. this type of behavior includes, but is not limited to, defecating on stage, urinating on stage, conducting unsuspecting chamber music members during the concert (must not be done in rehearsal to maximize effect), mistreating your host family, choking small mammals with ignorance, talking with a f-ggotesque accent, not knowing where the trash can is in one’s own home, giving self-centered, sh-tty thank-you speeches, and playing such songs as “my amazingly well adapted piano version of home sweet home” as an encore.
it is very difficult for anyone to pull off truly jose-luising a performance, save for the man himself. in fact, this editor has rarely see it done. it can be -ssumed that in order to achieve the proper focus for such a difficult task that one must already have certain prerequisite character definitions: wealth, over-gelled over-styled hair, a small p-n-s, a predisposition towards small boys, an otherwise h-m-phobic att-tude, and most importantly, a small gerbel glued to a large rod held in place with a tape gun and jammed firmly up an individual’s -rs-.
man, that guy is completely jose-luising that performance….i’ll be washing the urine out of my hair for days!
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