Land Manatee
noun: a large, gelatinous woman who’s t-ts look like she’s carrying a large pizza under each arm. host to kankles, fupa’s, (fat upper p-ssy area,) and major back cleavage. usually found with at least 17 items in the ten item or less line at your local wal-mart, haggling the clerk over the validity of expired little debbie coupons. often times riding electric scooters designated for the handicapped, though their sense of ent-tlement suggests they deserve them more. never step between a land manatee and it’s prey. like hippos, they are responsible for more deaths every year than lions and sharks combined. especially if you step on their chalupa fupa…
“holy f-ck, bro! do you see the girth on that gorgon?”
“yeah, man. that is a f-cking land manatee… back away slowly before she stampedes.i don’t feel like being gored… ”
an incredibly fat person. in particular, a land manatee has little in the way of recognizable skeletal structure. rolls of fat disguish the neck, as well as much of the arms and legs.
unlike the real manatee which arguably faces the threat of extinction, the land manatee enjoys ever growing numbers thanks to north america’s penchant for fatty food and over eating. the land manatee faces no natural predators and lives primarily off fast food and frozen tv dinners, though they are also known to eat vast quant-ties of pretty much everything.
burger king employee: “our deeper fryer is empty! i mean the grease is completely gone, sucked dry.”
manager: “land manatees….get the harpoon gun, they can’t have gone far.”
a very large dispicable human being with bright blue eyes and no neck rr. bearing a striking resemblance to a wild manatee, she tends to have a large -ss where the bulk of the blubber is stored. her land waddle has been known to severly injure small children, and crack the city streets that she prowls on.
yeah dawg, can’t believe you hit and quit that land manatee.
domesticated mature bovine.
named for it’s manatee-like grazing habits.
see cow
the land manatee walked slowly toward the fence and began eating the gr-ss.
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