LaShitivus


a professional who simultaneously meets the peter-princ-p-l standard & definition while being a functioning alcoholic. this person despite all their “unknown” short-comings (including but not limited to, inability to spell, read and write on a 10th grade english level) and lack of general intelligence will be successfully promoted up the ranks. a lash-tivus will survive and thrive in fortune 500 companies and law firms a like. the reason for the lash-tivus’s success remains unknown, but his taste in scotch, women and suits is impeccable.
as an -ssociate young lash-tivus is sent to court to file a minor motion. bored and hung over lash-tivus forgets to file the motion and hits on an attractive court reporter – who turns out to be a young partner’s wife. upon his return senior partners hear about the spectacle and find this encounter amusing. they then offer lash-tivus a full time position after graduating.

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