late-night piss


when you’re a little kid and you really don’t f-cking want to go to bed, you’re desperate. you’re not tired, you’re not ready for this sh-t. h-ll, you can play some nintendo right now if you wanted to. but no, your parents are f-cking d-cks and say, “go to bed or i’ll punish yo b-tch-ss!” i don’t know if they mean punish or just the regular kind, but whatever. they’re f-cking parents.

so you know what you do? you say “mooooom, i need to go pee-pee.” those dumb-sses will fall for it every f-cking time, i can guarantee that sh-t. put a money-back guarantee and i’ll f-cking give you a million dollars if it doesn’t work.

the only drawback to this is that the p-ss will only take around 1-2 minutes, 3 minutes if you really know how to make up bullsh-t excuses. below is a good-ss example of a situation just like the one described.
mom: go the f-ck to bed, f-ggot!
kid: mom, i need to take a late-night p-ss! i don’t want to wet the bed again!
mom: fine, but make it quick, you little sh-t.
kid: (inside his head) “awwwwwww yeaaaaaaaaaa”

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