Lava Shits


a serious fecal disorder. usually happens to people after eating mexican cuisine. using too much hot sauce, or holding in your sh-t all day.

when you have lava sh-ts, you may experience some or all of the following:

1. a bad stomach ache.
2. having chunky, liquid p–p.
3. said p–p burns your -sshole.
4. it all comes out at once, or takes forever.
5. it goes on all day.
say you’re on the phone with somebody you know. for the sake of argument, we’ll call girl a ‘melissa’ and boy a ‘john’.

john: melissa, are you there?
—–no response from melissa——
john: melissa?! answer me please! i am going to die!
—–still no response—–
–gunshots–
john killed himself, because he thought melissa was ignoring him. when in reality, she had the lava sh-ts and laid the phone down. john’s life could have been saved, if melissa wasn’t so ashamed of having lava sh-t and just told him about it.

moral of story: when you have lava sh-ts, tell everyone.

Read Also:

  • She'll lick your butt

    a term you yell out when a friend/acquaintance has a ugly and/or fat girl talking to or flirting with him. the theory is that she’s so ugly and/or fat that she has to step it up and chow some -ss to make up for her lack of aesthetics. mainly for use in bars/clubs. i yelled, […]

  • Shenanican't

    shenanigans that go wrong usually ending up in an epic fail. shua: “where did daryl go?” dave: “f-cker tried to fart in my face when i sat down and ended up sh-tting himself!” shua: “epic shenanican’t hahaha!”

  • emophobe

    somebody who has a phobia of emo music/emolicious kids. often considers themselves a hardcore metal fan. my friend andy is such an emophobe. someone who is tired of all the “buzz” surrounding the “emo” cr-p he’s an emophobe, he sighs everytime he sees an “emo” kid plural form of emophobe. someone who is too stupid, […]

  • Throbbing Tiger

    when you talk your ex into a pity f-ck after breaking up with her then put ben-gay on your condom and proceed to go b-lls deep. upon finishing you depart immediately leaving her tiger throbbing. when i found out my girl hooked up with greg i proceeded to break up with her but not without […]

  • Throw rocks at trains

    throwing rocks at trains is an acceptable alternative to engaging in mainstream activities on any given holiday due to your inability to properly partic-p-te for any reason. this is taken from charlie and mac’s tradition in it’s always sunny in philadelphia of throwing rocks at trains on christmas. i just found out my mom would […]


Disclaimer: Lava Shits definition / meaning should not be considered complete, up to date, and is not intended to be used in place of a visit, consultation, or advice of a legal, medical, or any other professional. All content on this website is for informational purposes only.