lesbiatitis
a mildly contagious viral infection typically transmitted via direct contact with a bleeding wound or mucous membrane. though most prevalent in metropolitan areas, infections characteristic of the virus have been doc-mented in numerous remote, wooded locations.
side effects may develop in women of any age and include s-xual activity with the same gender, reduced awareness of fashion, aggressive behavior, increased appet-te and an inexplicable affinity for construction projects and birkenstocks.
while the virus does not respond to traditional antiretroviral therapies, some individuals demonstrate a natural resistance to the infection and have been known to miraculously recover, as in the case of anne heche.
after losing most of her hair from lesbiat-tis, ellen is now sporting a mullet.
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