Maryland

the state with the biggest ident-ty crisis in america. parts of it like dc and baltimore are extremely ghetto, with two of the top 5 murder rates in the country. balto is the heroine capital of the world. suburbs like potomac are bethesda are among the richest and most well educated in the country, and populated by lawyers and doctors with preppy rich children who drive benz’s. to the far west, you have the type of hicks that live in west virginia up in the appalachian mountains. to the south and the east you have the kind of hicks you might find in mississippi. in ocean city you have retired people who decided to go live on the beach. around the bay area, you have a lot of fisherman. maryland may be mixed up, but the crabs are d-mn good.
q: what do you get when you mix a drug dealer, a m-ss murderer, a nascar driver and a fisherman?

a: a marylander
i’m from maryland. we’re not from the south, nor do we have an accent. we’re also not new england, we’re the mid atlantic. it’s soda, not pop. it’s a sub, not a hoagie. it’s the beach not the sh-r- and we drink water not “wooder”. it’s acceptable to say “where y’all goin?” in short of “where are you going?” it’s pizza not pie. it’s dc not washington. we know what bad traffic really looks like, how to use a traffic circle, and how to pump our own gas. we know what and where the naval academy is. it’s not unusual to eat at a resturant with no shirts, no shoes, and your boat parked out front. we love crabs, corn, and beer. there is no place like it.
harford county rocks!
a little bit of everywhere else, plus an -ss ton of old bay seasoning.
maryland is the only place where you can purchase old bay flavored potato chips.
america in minature. there is basically nothing in america that won’t also be found in maryland. we have the rich and the poor, farmland, beaches, cities, oceans, and bays, republicans and democrats, anything you name it. we have the orioles and the ravens who kick b-tt most of the time. baltimore, which might as well be the capital, is the stronghold of maryland. in baltimore you will notice an accent that is different from the rest of the people in maryland cause yes we do say stuff like wooder instead of water. o yea, and if you live in maryland and don’t eat the famous crabs, you are considered to be weird. in short, maryland is the best state to live in if you want to experience america.
person 1: i want to live in one place but still explore all of america
person 2: o just move to maryland then.
an awesome state that isn’t too hick-filled, but not all snotty like other states up north.
maryland is the illest state
seventh state admitted to union. population, ~5.5 million. has one of the country’s largest metro areas (baltimore-washington corridor), one of the larger public universities in the country (umd), and once proud sports franchises (orioles). has a dual ident-ty, as it’s both a mid-atlantic state and a southern state, because it’s south of the mason-dixon line.
“the chaining and gagging of bobby seale / somebody tell these maryland governors to be for real.” – gil scott-heron
where the crabs are d-mn good, where the “hood” is in a suburb, where one of the richest counties is 20 minutes away from d.c., where d.c. is d dot c dot, where the umd terrapins will smash anybody, where there is a tree every two feet and where you can be shot(b-more) 30 minutes away from a bougie neighborhood.
mo county and b-ville stand up!!

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