Moorestown


ranked #1 place to live in the united states by cnn.
top schools, good jobs, and nice homes at reasonable prices. the town, founded by quakers, bans the sale of alcohol, but there’s plenty of night life in philadelphia, just 15 miles away. about half the work force commutes to philadelphia. easy access to highways means a trip to the jersey sh-r- takes less than an hour, and new york city is 90 minutes away in the opposite direction.

what’s the number #1 town in the nation to live, that would be moorestown, nj.
a small extremely boring town in burlington county, new jersey. where clueless parents grant their kids money and permission to drink and smoke all the time. there is excellent athletics from moorestown, for instants the girls lacrosse team was #1 in the nation. it’s too bad that parents spoil their kids so much, little b-tches like blair hornstine can sue for not being valdictorian. never move there it’s h-ll.
joey moved to moorestown only to end up begging his parents to move to sibera a month later.
a boring crackerjack town where all the kids drink hard liquor from the time they stepped out of their mama and all the girls are trash if their purse is below 500 dollars and polo shirts are not only what you wear but if you don’t you get suspended oh and where all the black people try to be black but act so white it is not even funny and the white people act blacker than the the black people and the puerto rican people say how much they love puerto rico every two seconds that it literally makes you sick and in need of a therapist
sally: a yo dawg what we doin tonite hoffa

bonquisha: mark do we have any plans for this evening?

juan: puerto rico!!! ohhhhhhhh (two seconds later) boricua para viva!!!!! ( are you gonna change your cultural background anytime soon?)
a town in southern new jersey, near philadelphia.

synonym: mo’town
moorestown is such a boring place to live that i sometimes want to stab myself in the throat with a pen just to end the pain.
a quaint little towne where, one would -ssume not much goes on. but in fact, the opposite would be correct.

nights spent upon the main avenue can be quite dangerous for those who are not prepared. gangs of wild ruffians do roam but one can easily fend them off with some wity banter.

the senior house of education is a well honered plae to attend if, you don’t mind large taxes on your earnings. some may say the women of the school happen to be increadibly flirtatious others say they are well endowed with large bosoms. the professors run a tight ship making sure our education is of the highest quality.

the anglo-saxon race is the majority while other lesser races do sp-rs-ly populate the towne.

the shopping district on the main avenue does contain many fine eateries but the stores are begining to show their age.

now for the parts of moorestowne that cause woe. the towne does contain a large criminal underbelly. they normally won’t bother you unless you don’t pay their protection fines. but fret not! a large swathe of their lairs of evil have been desposed of by the towne’s constables. the towne’s constables do seem a bit gruff but over time one will learn to cherish their existence after they save you from some of the townes famous rowdy ragam-ffins.

in clonclusion the towns is a nice place to live as long as you come prepared with knowledge and coin.
“i say my fellow do you know of a nice place to make my way in life?”

“why, yes good sir i do know of such a place, the towne of moorestowne. but heed this warning, try not to trifle with the dangerous outlaws that inhabit portions of the towne”
a popped collar town filled with emo and punk rock wannabees. the girls are all stuck up hoes, study all the time. or play lacrosse and have no time for anything that would resemble a life. theres this hot frosh (big phel’s sister) and theres this other cute chick in my history cl-ss. i dont know her name-possibly a junior. everyones clothes are from the evil a’s/hollister or even worse. girls all have designer bags that cost more than my whole closet. you can always overhear someone saying ” im not rich!!” when really their next door neighbor is jevon kirsch. even the lenola kids arent poor compared to the “ghetto” of other towns. oh and shut up there is no ghetto in moorestown no matter what you say. everyone is drunk starting friday night and going strong all through sunday. potheads galore as well.
“omg sarah i love love love emoo.”
“oh emm gee lexxii, like same hurr!!!”
“oh wait, do you have the kanye west cd?!?!?”
“oh course boo, want me to send it to your itunes through my new hi tech computer i got like yesterday.”
“psh no. are you forgetting this is moorestown-# 1 town in the nation..daddy knows kanye from work biotch. ill jus tget it from the rapper himself at daddys next party thingie!”

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