New Mexico

state that lies between texas and arizona, largly unknown to most citizens of the united states except for residents, the government, the military, conspiracy theorists, and some artsy folks. best known for its nukes, roswell, santa fe, chile, its perpetually sunny weather, and desert environment and landscape.
currently and historically, new mexico is home to a lot of top secret scientific research. because of this, new mexico would have the third largest nuclear -rs-nal in the world if it split from the us. but realistically such a thing would never happen. new mexico also has a huge hole in the ground called wipp for storing nuclear waste.
the state has a large hispanic population, most of whom don’t know or refuse to speak spanish. the state also has a large native american population, most of whom belong to several pueblo tribes. there are also many caucasians, mostly of germanic descent.
although most americans are ignorant about new mexico, it has played an important role in history. it was the first region of what is now the us to be settled, it was the site of the first successful indian revolt, it kept the civil war from spreading west by preventing texas and the south from taking over mexico and california, it was the site of the first nuclear weapons test, and, well, roswell, if you believe anything happened there.
the ups to living in new mexico are the constant sunshine, the relaxed mood, the low cost of living, and plenty of government money and employment. new mexico is also pretty safe from earthquakes and tornadoes. the downs are the droughts, hoodlums-scavs-chavs-ghettodwellerwannabes, and an occasional wildfire if you are foolish and/or rich enough to build a house in or near a forest.
new mexico: the land of enchantment
there’s no comparison between new mexican chile and texan chili. chile kicks chili’s -ss and is way hotter.
new mexico sucks.
new mexico is beautiful
unbeknown to almost all, it is part of the united states and has no affiliation to mexico other than its name and its large population of latinos
new mexican resident: man, it was a long drive here from new mexico.

ignorant american: there’s a new mexico?!?!
a very beautiful state in the usa located north of mexico, south of colorado, east of arizona, and west of texas. it’s capital is santa fe, and it’s largest city is albuquerque. new mexico has a very rich history. the majority of people who live there are spanish, mexican, native american, or white. spanish is commonly spoke there. also an attraction for hippies, artists, and rich people. new mexico stands out with very distinct political and cultural ideals from the rest of the united states. new mexico is also known for los alamos national lab, which has caused a great amount of pollution and is not supported by most new mexico residents.
new mexico has a specific type of red and green chiles which do not grow anywhere else in the world. they are used in almost every restaurant in the state. if you order a dish you will most likely be asked “would you like red or green chile on that?”
red chile is more earthy and robust, while green chile is more fruity and usually more spicy. you can also ask for ‘christmas’ which means both.
new mexico is a desert region.
possibly one of the sh-ttiest states in the united states. yes. it is in the united states for you ignorant b-tches. no. people dont ride camels or live in teepees. it is an ugly wasteland of a desert and people just pretend to appreciate its “natural beauty”, which is really just another way of saying godd-mn we live in a f-cking sh-thole, what the f-ck is out here besides dirt and cactus.
watch “breaking bad”, and you will know what i am talking about.

albuquerque happens to be the biggest breeding ground of all stupidity in the state, with the ridiculous suburb of rio rancho. public education sucks, and is taught by demeaning ignorant b-st-rds. people cannot drive. there are always drunk natives walking the streets. people wonder why we have such a big drug problem? well maybe if you arrogant pr-cks gave the youth of new mexico somewhere to hang out and do something productive, we wouldnt find our youth consumed with addictions and stupidity. teen pregnancy happens to be one of the highest rates, and the mothers tend to be teenagers who were probably dropped on their heads as babies. the population consists of mostly people of hispanic descent, caucasians, and natives. you meet a couple types of hispanic stereotypes, some are very family oriented, with high goals, and traditional values, while the rest make the us hate the mexicans for hopping the border, as they are uneducated, use the welfare system, breed like rabbits, wear their pants below their b-ttocks, and draw on their godd-mn eyebrows with sharpies. they create needless crime with their stupid gangs and ignorance. the caucasians tend to either be incredibly wealthy and stuck up, or the biggest f-cking hicks you will ever meet, probably inbred and mutated by all the nuclear waste in the ground. meth is a huge problem here. the natives are either very smart or uber alchoholics.

there is a huge education gap here with the people, there are the very well educated who work in the labs, creating weapons to destroy the planet. while the majority of people here are complete idiots.

don’t come to new mexico.
hey, new mexico is that sh-thole state that oversaw the manhattan project.
friendly people, beautiful mountains, forests, desert and, of course, the best food in the world.
can’t wait to return to new mexico and eat a burrito with green chilies.
largely unknown state west of texas with the 2nd largest drug problem in the us. the only good things to come from here are breaking bad, the nuclear bomb, and brian urlacher.
white trash: dude, new mexico sucks. why’d they film breaking bad here?

latino: ¿usted está hablando mierda sobre mi casa, gringo perra?
despite being the state with the highest level of federal subsidies in the lower 48 states, new mexico and its residents don’t really have a lot to show for it. albuquerque has a dirty, run-down, “mad max” quality to it. the people are remarkably uneducated and unfriendly. going to albuquerque is like taking a trip to some third world city. besides the risk of being accosted by drug addicts in the rather disappointing “old town” section, one also faces the real possibility of running over one of the city’s countless mentally ill homeless, who routinely walk into oncoming traffic to commit suicide. one may also expect to be awakened in the middle of the night by scavengers, both animal and human, “dumpster-diving” through others’ trash. if you’re going, then do be sure to carry a lot of change as beggars and panhandlers frequent many of the parking lots…they will har-ss you if you don’t cough up a few quarters or something.
i am sorry every time that i go to new mexico: there are as yet no signs of intelligent life.
why do i have to keep going to…ugh…new mexico?