one-eyed dick-weave
panicky movement around unfamiliar genitalia when one’s contact lens speeds away through a trough-flow
witnessed at a gig in north london. there were perhaps eight guys p-ssing and others waiting behind them. semi-blind, my friend unexpectedly became intimate with the majority of them. he didn’t so much weave as wave his arms about very oddly – and any touch of his did not receive affection.
fortunately, after all the unintentional c-ck-play, he found what he had really been looking for. what had bounced out so spectacularly was now resting dimly by the drain. his hands went in without a moment’s thought as i waited for the punters to turn really nasty. after all, they weren’t exactly in town that night for some weird vogueing below their b-ll-cks.
but all the dark stares were replaced by total disbelief when my friend put the lens back in unwashed. and then there was his tour-de-force – a sudden skid at the exit and a lightning reaction that just stopped him from landing t-ts upwards. i scarpered. i can’t even remember what band was playing that night and, even in nightmares, i find it hard to see them.
but i guess that i generally think of them as bathed in yellow and in my mind they have black eyes for some reason. there is a lot of jerky movement and much falling about in the confusion – and, well, what could all that be i have to wonder? f-ck me, i think they are doing a one-eyed d-ck-weave dance – let me out of here at this point – let me out. of course, we used to go to a lot of gigs then but since my illness i’ve not got out very often.
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