Phlerm


the thick and almost malleable combination of phlegm from the mucus membrane in your throat and thick, usually potent, s-m-n. usually found at the crime scene or a rape victim, or the bedroom of a housewife trying to rekindle her love with her husband of 20 years, but couldn’t stand the taste of her mate’s sperm and spat it back out, half-way through swallowing.

similar (s-xual) terms include casper’s tears, spit d-cker, white wedding, tapioh-no!, and toothpaste gag.
officer: well, looks like this was an oral s-x rape case, sir!
lieutenant: really, officer? what makes you say that?
officer: see that, sir? -points to a clump of white goo on the pillow, next to drips of blood- that, sir, is pure bona-fide phlerm.
lieutenant: what’s phlerm?
officer: look it up on urban dictionary. it ain’t pretty. g-d help the victim…

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