Plastic Gangster


a wannabe gangster, or as the ‘plas-gang’ in question might say, “gangsta!!” with unnecessary emphasis on the “sta!!” part. odd. and the sort of things that a plastic gangster might get up to are; 1. telling other people to do things. 2. getting other people to fight for them. 3. generally doing everything that real gangsters would do, but with less conviction and intent. and then, when they get in real situations, they always wuss out of the whole thing. like if they could smash up a fence, they’d be like, nope, sorry. gotta go home for a bath. or…something.
1. “hey man, you coming out tonight? we’re smashing up an old barn?”
“nah, i’ve….er…gotta go for a bath.”

2. “oi, you, get over here and fight this guy for me!”
“why?”
“cos’ i’m a gangstaa!!”
“you’re a fool.”
“hey, shut up.”
“screw you smiley, i’m going home.”
“awww…”

3. “are you a plastic gangster?”
“yes.”
“right-o. get lost.”
“er….k”
some little mug that thinks he’s proper hard.

regularly gives it the big’un but when it comes down to it he’s all mouth and no b-ll-cks.
man 1: “is that geezer a bit of of a hard nut then?”

man 2: “nah mate, he’s nuffin but a plastic gangster”

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