Pollock the Porcelain


diarrhea of such an extreme and explosive nature as to render the inside of one’s toilet bowl like a concave representation of a jackson pollock painting.

may be the result of extremely poor and unfortunate dietary decisions, (very) excessive beer consumption, invasive organisms, or simply g-d’s way of communicating “his love” for you.

not to be misconstrued as “important” or “avant-garde art.”
pollock the porcelain: verb

“steve-o really pollocked the porcelain this morning. it’s been a real disaster zone. impossible to clean up. try putting that on one of those ‘oxy-clean’ infomercials.”

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