Poonanniphobia
the fear, discomfort and hesitation to use nightclub toilets for the risk of being pressured to purchase things such as a few sprays of deodorant, hair gel, lollies and chewing gum.
the merchant, often of black origin will often shout catchy one-liners when not dealing with clients such as
“no armani, no poonani”
“no spray, no lay”
“no splash, no gash”
“no juice, no poos (puss)”
“no cologne, ya going home alone”
“no diesel, no weasel”
“no wax, no sax (s-x)”
to make this situation particularly awkward, the merchant is known to hold paper towels towards you forcing you to dry your hands in front of him and his selection of products.
the merchant will put on a loud african sounding accent until he speaks to someone he knows and returns to his actual voice.
josh: i’m bursting for a p-ss.
nick: go then, the toilet’s just there.
josh: nah man, i’ve got poonanniphobia, i’ll hold it as long as i can.
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