Provenzano
dave provenzano. a greasy pseudo-gino living in a pimp-fantasy land with a stench similar to that of a wet dog. he is either an idiot, or his motor functions were impaired by a blow to the head, because he can’t seem to stop dancing when techno music starts playing. he also has trouble keeping his shirt, and sometimes his pants, on. especially when girls are around. constantly refers to people as “bros” or “broman”. cries when he is drunk. has a chicken wing fetish.
ryan – “put your d-mn shirt on, and stop getting wing sauce all over yourself.”
dave (starts dancing and clapping while eating a chicken wing) – “i’m a pimp bros”
a total sc-mbag and pathological liar who hides the fact that hes currently living with his girlfriend so that he can date other women at the same time. a provenzano has been cohabitating with his girlfriend the entire duration of your relationship, much to your surprise and chagrin. warning signs that your man is a philandering piece of sh-t provenzano include your two timing boyfriend taking you out to his lake house (that is hours away from civilization) for weekends together (instead of spending time with you at his house or apartment), him making shady secret phone calls late at night or early in the morning, him constantly on edge and gaurding his cell phone from view, and him being tagged by hideous women in ridiculous pictures on facebook, for all to see. he promptly untags himself from these embarissing pictures a day or so later. said man is an -sshole a liar, and a rat b-st-rd.
i just found out that this guy im dating has a girlfriend, and they live together! i’ve been provenzano’d!
if that rat b-st-rd provenzano were half as good an actor on tv as he is with the women he’s two-timing then maybe he wouldn’t have gotten booted off a reality show after 1 measly season.
i called my boyfriends cell today, and his ‘girlfriend’ picked up. they live in harlem together. that sc-mbag totally provenzano’d me!
he’s had a live in girlfriend this entire time we’ve been dating. i can’t believe he’s such a douchebag provenzano.
she is devastated. turns out her mans been provenzanoing her behind her back this entire time.
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