River Edge
a small town in “prestigious” bergen county known for absurdly high property taxes. many years ago, before the housing bubble (2001-2006) river edge was simply a middle cl-ss town with modest sized capes, colonials and ranch homes built in the 1940s. the real estate bubble which created easy financing and high demand transfomed these 50 x 100 lots into havens for the center hall colonial, which was known for a gawdy chandelier from home depot proudly on display in a large window above the door. the new residents who moved into these houses -ssumed that they were alpine material because of their houses and large chevy tahoe suvs. please don’t be fooled. anyone with a heloc could expand their pos cape cod and become a baller.
did you hear about the blue ribbon schools in river edge?
or
how about those high river edge property taxes? i hear they make our kids smarter!
river edge is a wealthy town in bergen county. is big enough so it has two elementary schools in it, and one middle school. shares a high school and their middle school with oradell, another nearby town that is smaller than river edge.
guy #1: why does river edge share a high school with oradell?
guy #2: cause oradell only has like 20 students in one grade.
a small “wealthy” town in bergen county, new jersey, usa.
filled with generally weird anglo-ish and korean people.
small town that borders new milford, hackensack/hackensack river, oradell, and paramus. shares a school district (river dell) with nearby oradell.
it is important to remember that river edge is the much more upright and -ssiduous part of river dell.
but, people have to stop building those hideous mcmansions. ugh.
highlights include: cvs, the diner, part of van saun county park, total wine and more, sanducci’s, the asian food market, and the carousel, a convience store.
uhmm a few potheads and guido kids around but they’re alright.
general teenage shenanigans, i guess.
river edge has an amazing block on manning ave between bogert and kinderkamack.
Read Also:
- campsite
what happens when a group of males gets collectively h-rny and each starts pitching a tent. ms. dusek is the hottest hot teacher on campus. whenever she’s teaching a cl-ss, the room becomes a total campsite! a spot where two or more teammates sit and wait for the enemy to run by as an easy […]
- The Italian Iso
nickname given to kobe bryant on sportsnation the italian iso wins another nba championship.
- the jew claw
a running joke from the ali g show. borat is terribly prejudiced against women, minorities and the like, but most of all, against jews. in one episode of the show (borat’s guide to america) he interviews a martial arts instructor and first asks what to do if a “chocolate-faced” person comes and attacks you. the […]
- Canadian Defensive
similar to the roman war helmet, except you put your -n-s on their nose, place your b-lls on their chin and let your p-n-s extend down their throat. brendan p-ssed out early, so i gave him the ol’ canadian defensive.
- can of shame
a demoralizing term for the seasoned, or unprepared dope smoker that is on vacation and just scored dope on the beach and cannot locate or was unable to bring the proper smoking utensils, and thus has to poke holes in an old pop or beer can in order to smoke their stash. i went down […]