RJ Friday


first created by the ancient romans, it was a customary day of celebration known as “ora officium deis veneris.” the weekly celebration honors the ‘rim job,’ or the act of licking another’s b-tthole. rim job parties are customary in more modern times, and have become more well known, especially during the past few years. the once weekly holiday has become a daily festivity: rj mondays, rj tuesdays, rj wednesdays, rj thursdays, rj sat-rdays, and rj sundays are now celebrated worldwide. the leader of the movement, under the alias “imma eshol” has transformed the once obscure holiday into a nationwide phenomenon. barack obama, current president of the united states, was quoted as saying of the holiday, “yes, i love rj day, fridays in particular. nothing gets you going quite like someone eating your -sshole. it’s incredible.”
person 1: hey, guess what day it is!
person 2: i dunno, easter?
person 1: guess again…
person 2: rj friday, i can’t believe i forgot! wasn’t yesterday rj day?
person 1: yeah, and the day before that…now that you think about it, don’t we always celebrate rj day?
person 2: d-mn right. i love it when b-tches eat my -sshole.
person 1: amen to that.

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