Sabretooth Crotch Crickets
(n.) (pl.) a term that often refers to the most advanced stage of pubic lice. however, sabretooth crotch crickets (sccs) are a seperate (but related) secies.
sccs are found in the pubic region of exceptionally promiscuous females and males (human). while shaving and intense washing can sometimes lower the population of an scc nest, sccs have never been known to disappear completely within the host’s lifetime. hosts often fail to realize the severity of their condition before the number of scc’s around/on their genitalia number in the high teens or more.
sccs, occasionally described as miniature hercules beetles, have proportianlly large pincers; however these can vary in configuration from cricket to cricket.
when provoked (rough s-x will do it), sccs often emit a low-volume hissing or buzzing sound to warn of a painful attack (the onset of this sound is in fact when many affected people first realize that something is horribly wrong down south–otherwise, sccs do not usually draw attention to themselves and can be quite reclusive). this sound is regularly exaggerated by people unfamiliar with sccs, because it’s d-mn funny if someone else has them but you don’t.
dude #1: “yeah, i’m going over by -girl’s name-‘s apartment tonight…i think it’s gonna be a wild time…”
dude #2: “don’t do it, seriously! tony told me he was gonna hit that sheeit one time and there wuz sccs all up in it”
dude #1: “what the ? are sccs? you just playin’ right?”
dude #2: “i thought you knew…it means sabretooth crotch crickets, man! back off the nasty ‘tang, bro!”
dude #1: “aw d-mn! i thought i was gonna git me some tonight…thanks for the heads up though.”
fuzzy little crickets that bite hard leaving b-mps and zits in the crotch region of men and women.
these animals are transmitted from dirty women while having intercourse. if a male is bitten it is because they jump off the female, bite the male and then jump back on to the females pubic hair region.
for females to rid of these, they must shave their pubic region completely.
ouch! i think i was bitten by sabre tooth crotch crickets!
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