Sexual Resume


a doc-ment in which men can keep record of their s-xual encounters, to be presented as proof of experience when enticing a lady friend.
doug: “h-llo candy, i’d like to offer you a copy of my s-xual resume. as you can see, when i was 13 i did the ziggy with a professional gymnist from the czech republic, when i was 15 i eiffel towered my friend cameron’s sister (in his room), and at 19 i received my first rusty trombone from a tibetan yoga master named crystal. she has offered to provide a recommendation, if necessary.”

Read Also:

  • bags under eyes

    dark semi circle that appear under a persons eyes, when stressed or through lack of sleep. these can often be raised and appear swollen. i’m so tired i have bags under eyes

  • ass like a ten year old boy

    describing a woman with slim hips and small, perky b-ttocks that olympic swimmer had an -ss like a ten year old boy

  • Ernie Dingo

    black host of the great outdoors. thinks he’s funny. ernie dingo gets done in the b-m.

  • bugs on the windshield

    the residue that remains in your teeth during or after eating a meal. often most pr-nounced when a piece of lettuce or spinach gets stuck in your teeth after consuming a salad. yo dude, you’ve got some bugs on the windshield. you may want to get a toothpick or floss to clean up a bit […]

  • Kylie ann Petrie

    kylie ann petrie is pretty much the definition of the coolest person in the world. tu sabes? yeah, kids with the name kylie ann petrie are defined as cool kids. but too bad for you, because there is one and only one kylie ann petrie. so for all of you other kids, you are just […]


Disclaimer: Sexual Resume definition / meaning should not be considered complete, up to date, and is not intended to be used in place of a visit, consultation, or advice of a legal, medical, or any other professional. All content on this website is for informational purposes only.