Stealth Caterpillar


the act of sneakily crossing a large distance in a sleeping bag because one is too lazy to leave it and walk. in order to become the legendary stealth caterpillar you must do the ‘inching’ movement that caterpillars are known for. you must also be incredibly sketchy and stealthy.

being a stealth caterpillar is a prestigious station and the capability to be in such an occupation generally limited to theatre technicians.
bob- “stan, it’s the middle of the night. what are you doing?”
stan- “well, i’m being a stealth caterpillar on my way to the restroom.”
bob- “you’re not inching.”
stan- “what?”
bob- “you are not inching.”
stan- “well i don’t see how that really makes a–
bob- “you are not worthy!”

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