Sushiitis
a specific form of gastroenteritis resulting from the ingestion of sushi which is ridden with bacteria due to unclean preparation and the use of expired ingredients. symptoms begin with slight gurgling and bloating of the stomach, progressing to profuse diarrhoea and vomiting. sushiitis onsets at precisely 8 hours post-ingestion and ceases at 48 hours post-ingestion. the recovery process is unable to be hastened, however it may be facilitiated with a brief visit to an emergency department for intravenous fluids, anti-emetics, and a cuddle from a nurse.
lunch: sushi
8 hours p-ss
tummy: “grrrrrrrrgle”….diarrhoea……vomit.
sushi-eater: “oh no! it’s sushiitis! never again will i eat sushi!”
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