Swiss Army Minority
this is the golden unicorn of token friends. befriending this person make you immune to accusations of discrimination of all kinds.
the best example of this is the elderly black lesbian paraplegic that we shall dub emma. she’s the perfect token because she covers all bases. by befriending emma you’re no longer racist or s-xist; nor do you discriminate towards age, ability/mobility, or s-xual orientation.
jack: yo willard….i heard you got sued for only hiring white people
willard: yeah, people are foolish
jack: well what did you do?
willard: i showed them a picture of our greeter, emma
jack: who is she?
willard: some old crusty wheelchair-bound n-gg-r dyk- i hired
jack: ah, a swiss army minority
willard: yeah, and she can cook greens like a motherf-cker
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