tap the moose



(verb)
1. to engage in s*xual intercourse with a hairy and/or canadian girl (usually to gratify a kink or fetish) and slay that poon

2. to literally prod a f*cking moose. like, seriously. why would you do that? all it’s trying to do is eat some gr*ss or whatever the f*ck moose do these days. also, what is the plural of ‘moose’? is it ‘moose’ or ‘mooses’?… ‘miise’?
1.

(example 1)
a: “i’m gonna tap the moose tonight!”
b: “yes get in there m8!”
(example 2)
a: “come on, ladies! let’s get our mooses tapped, eh!?”
b: “don’t you mean ‘moose tapped’?”
c: “i’m pretty sure it’s ‘miise’, eh…”

2.
(at the zoo)
a: “look at all the wildlife!”
b: “daddy, can i tap the moose?”
a: “why would you do that?”
b: “because it’s the most beautiful of all the mooses in the world!”
a: “it’s ‘miise’, and no, that would be your mother.”

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